“Ay aḥbib ma din numes, ammus yettirid s waman…”

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Melmi akka ruḥen akken ad d-uɣalen ?  D widen n yiḍelli i yellan ass-a,  xas ulama bedlen taglimt. S tebrek-nni n zik si dehnen  tagnit.  S  tesmem n zik si seqqan tarbut.  Xas nettu-ten yiwwas, nutni ad aɣ-id-ttmektin.  Xas  nerwel fell-asen yiwwas, nutni ad aɣ-id-ttnadin. Ma ur  tumineḍ ɣer ass-a, seqsi amusnaw yeẓran netta ad ak-yinni  : « win ihajen awal yeẓra/ win yesuguten awal amek?/lhem ur t–id-tewwi lqedra/

lqedra i yilem d anamek ». Amek ara ṛuḥen ay ameɣbun ? Sanda ara ruḥen a ungif ?Ma tenwid takurt gar ifassen-ik, telqa i s-inesren ad tezzi ɣef yiri-ik.  Tecfiḍ ɣef ussan-nni yezrin, asmi akken  tettmeniḍ tamsunt di tneẓruft. Tecfiḍ ɣef ussan-nni yezrin, asmi turǧiḍ anṣib deg yixmir.  Tura  iles-ik yettɛani tatut. Izri-k yettcerig tagut. Idaṛen-ik  ɣef ɣman lejruḥ teddun ɣef uẓarif. Yecceḍ wawal ɣef yiri n wawal, tettuḍ amusnaw id-ak-yennan : « ay ahbib ma din numes/ ammus yettirid s waman /ay aḥbib ma temses i  nmessus/ temsas ula i d as-id  gan waman ».  Yeɣli ncir si telwiḥt. Aɣebaz deg tlemdeḍ ixuṣ.  Tuffiḍ lɛaz di tsusmi. Tuffiḍ ddel di lmenṭaq. Win yedrewḍen yettu tiselbi, win  yetmeɛnan yettu tiweqmi. Ccix  icceyex ɣef lmal-is, ameksa  yezha d ujawaq-is.  Ddunit abrid i teɛmer, wisen abrid mertayen ma d nger ?  Ma d kečc, ulayɣer a tbedleḍ, qqim kan am zik  sugut.  Wissen dɣa ma yelha uḥezeb ? Wissen tufra ma teṭṭhrab . ? Ɣer tudert ɛaryan id tkecmeḍ, asmi ara tt-tefɣeḍ sewjden-ak  lekfan.  Tettuḍ amusnaw id-ak yennan : « yeɣli unẓad ɣer  tarbut/yeblaɛ yedda d tlezdit n taḍḍut/win is -yennan teshel lmut/ur yessin i yellan deffir tagut ». Yulli leɣmam ɣef udlis, tawriqt i neldi  teɣmal. Tesliḍ asmi i k-nnan zikk-nni :  hum u ɣum, xas yelha wihin lebṣel qareḥ. Meɛna teksak-tt cfaya. D wina n yideli id yuɣalen, azekka d netta ara d yeṣiwḍen, ih  tura a teẓred i-ixeddem uqlileḥ.  Tedra-tt yid-k am tejra yeččan ifukawen-is, neɣ am uzrem yeqsen  tajeḥniṭ-is.  Lɛib ur yelli anda ur yelli, xas yella ulayɣer aten-wali. Akka id-as tenniḍ !  Ahat teslid , ahat xaṭi. Menɛa xas tesliḍ wis ma tecfiḍ i umusnaw asmi ik-yenna : « widen yeṭṭfen di telqa/anezɛa -nsen d cedda/widen yeftutsen di teṛha/cban iniɣem mi yerka ». Twahmeḍ ayen kemcen wudmawen ? D ussan kan ass-a i-imalen !   Tura ahat dayen tukiḍ !  Ldint wallen-ik ɣet tidet yellan. D widak ik yesegan niqal, id yezzin ak-ceblen ɣer deqal.  Tikli n tifireɛqas d agrireb neɣ d alluy, win iten-t iɛunden yeddu  lḥasul. Tebɣid iṭij di tili ? Ayen ihi di tili tnudaḍ itij ? Slan-ak medden mi id-asen-tenniḍ nekk d ahwawi. Timucuha s lqis, ma d- asxuref d dḥis. Anda akken geẓren lemtul id nulfan imnuda uḥackul. Win yettcirin yeẓra, win yettesmirin yesla. Amek akken id as-yenna umusnaw ? Aten diɣ tettuḍ ! Wi cqa ak-id nesmekti : « nekni nedda i wakud/nektal teɣzi n umecwar/ungif  ar assa yesferfud/di jiḥ i yuṛǧa leqrar »

Mi tebren tsarut temdel tawwurt. Wa yeqqim ɣef umanar, wayeḍ di tesha yeẓẓel. Wa deg waɣzan yettxatel, wa yeqqar mrehba s teryel.  Akka i d-ahdum n watmaten asmi nuɣan ɣef ucamlal.  Tagut akkin tettkufut, di lɛinṣer yesragen uɣrar. Lebyur ma ddin ččuren, timhujrit teswa-ten a m- udɣar. Ṣyaḍa n yifis d tixubta, tin n yizem d iseɣ. A win umu yeshel walluy , meyyez i lɣerẓa n trusi.   Ur yelli laman deg iḥiqal yif afaruj a t-iɛaṣṣi. Lmut ɣef win yedran  tefsus, ɣef win is-reglen tewɛar. Nnan lecxay  xas werǧin  weznan, win yesnan i lmizan meɛruf. A win yellan d ungif tixar, awexer izerb ɣef leɣrur. Ddunit ma teɣeẓẓif a nẓer amcum ma yiwwas ad yesteɣfer .  Imi yedda lqum ɣef tigecrar, anef kan , yura lɛar ad as-neḥḍer :   « nnig leɣmam .. iɛajer yillem/ddaw leɣmam.. lqum yetewhem/wa yeqqar akka ara tellem/wayeḍ , ɣef win yegren afagag, i tezzem »

Ait Slimane Hamid

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