Amdan am zik am tura yesḥitic ɣef ansi i d-yekka ? Sanga i‑iteddu ? Amek i d tallalit ? Acu-t wudem n lmut ? Amek alarmi llant tismin, dɣel, tayri, tugdi ?
Tidmi n umdan tezga teɣreq deg tamda n watwar imi, simmal tettqelib ɣef sebba n tilin d war tillin n tudert d unamek n taggra –ines ! Amek tedda ddunit d wamek i d-tusa ? D-tigi i d tuttriwin i itezzin di lmux n yal ales deg umaḍal di yal zzman, am akken i d as-yenna Jean Paul Sartre : « amdan ur nessenned ɣef tidet ur d nufi ara amḥadi deg ixef‑ines, yettuḥattem fell-as ad yesnulfu simmal ɛamel amdan ɣef leḥsab n ṣṣifa-s». Dayemmi ahat tuttriwin yecban « ansi, sani, ayen ?» d tid i d-yettuɣalen ɣer yal lqum di yal lqern. Amdan d mmi‑s n tuttiriwin !
D anect‑ a yakk mebla cekk i illan deffir n usnulfu n tusniwin am tin umi neqqar tizemnit( la philosophie). Seg Socrate ɣer ass-a, ɛeddi ɣef Ɛummer Xayyam, El Rumi, Ǧibran xalil Ǧibran, Sören Kierkegaard, Karl Jasper, Nicolas Bardiadev d wiyaḍ asteqsi mazal-it d wina i d netta, ur ibeddel ara telɣa : « amek i d amek n wamek ? »
Amdan am zik am tura yesḥitic ɣef ansi i d-yekka ? Sanga i‑iteddu ? Amek i d tallalit ? Acu-t wudem n lmut ? Amek alarmi llant tismin, dɣel, tayri, tugdi ? Deg uẓeṭṭa yecban wagi i yegren yizemniyen ulman n tidmi‑nsen amer ad jaben tifrat. Ddin d laɛwayed s wacu ttamnen medden ur llin ara d allalen yefran tamsalt wakali. Cekk d win izedɣen ul n yal amdan ama yumen naɣ werǧin yumin. Di tilawt d cekk-nni s timad-is i t-yezuɣuren ɣer unar n unadi amer tidet ad yid‑s yemlil yiwwas. Yeqqar Soren Kiekegaard : « xas ulama tudert ur tettwefhem alama s tuzya n tmuɣli ɣer wayen yezrin, lmaɛna nettidir-itt s unexzur yettwehin simmal ɣer zdat » ! Akka xas tuget n yemdanen smeyafen laɛdez n wallaɣ, teqqujer tdmi-nsen, akken ur tehin ara deg yiberden umenṭar d unadi ɣef « uẓar n taggut »,maca tira n wid yeẓran d akken kra nessen yella wayen ara d yenernin fell-as, kksen aqarif ɣef iberden n wallaɣ, akked d ussekud. Di yal tallit, s lmend n tira-nsen d wawalen-nsen,tenjaɛen taluft, tellind ẓerb ɣef ayen nwan wiyaḍ dayen yerdem ! Amazan‑nsen d win i d-yekkan srid yeqqar : « muqlet, llit-d allen nwen akken ad tewalim tudert s tmuɣli nniḍen, amer ussu deg tegnem d yir ussu ! ».
Deg abrid-agi, yettawin ɣer tegnatin n usekfel n kra yedurin, ur neshil wara, asfru n Lunis « amenuɣ » yegred tuttra i-aɣ- yattawin ɣer uɛiwed n tmuɣli ɣef unamek n wayen i-iḍerun di ddunit xas ulama tiṭ tesmeɛdezad i tmuɣli. Aya meṛṛa yettwabedred s wawalen yuzlen ɣef yilsawen n yal yiwen, d usexdem n kra n tugniwin yesduqusen allaɣ, yettnebicen tidmi.
S yifyar ireẓnen yeččuren d sser d uḥiḥa, yezzi umedyaz yisneɣ ɣer taluft n trad d imenɣi. Tuttra i d-yegger Lunis ɣer ugni n usɣerbel d tta : « acu i d- sebba n cwal ? Ayen amdan di yal lawan yezga yeɣreq di tamda n lfetna? » ? I wakken ad newweḍ ɣer tiririt,yunneg yisneɣ umedyaz ɣer wasmi tegzem timiṭ i tudert, ɣer wasmi tebda tettmurud d amured kan nnig wakal. Ɣer ussan deg kra ur yuri ɣef telwiḥt n tmedurt. ɣer tallit deg lawan yebda yettlal, Ɣer wussan asmi kulec yella melul. Di later n usefru yettban d akken seg yimi tella tudert,yella cwal d amunṭiḍ deg ijufar‑is!
Cwal anwi i‑t‑id yewwin? Amek i d‑yenunet? Kra yellan yebda asmi di lebḥer ahut‑iw yemmeɣ ɣef gma‑s:
Tafejrit tamezwarut
D ass amenzu di ddunit
Si lebḥer yefɣed lḥut
Yefɣed yiṭij iqubel-it
Kulci ɣur-s d amaynut
Ileḥqed gma-s yettwali-t
Ibrez ɣef gma-s yečča-t
Isuɣ uqbel ad yeɣli
Dɣa tuttra tegred iman‑is:
Ur ẓriɣ ara acmi
Lameɛni assen-i
I-yebda umenuɣ!
Ttemeḍfaren‑t timsel, ttemzuɣuren‑t ttawin‑t ɣer ugni n lmuḥal. Amdan asmi d yudder ɣer lqɛa tussa‑d nuba‑s akken ad yeserwet. Yelḥa kra isurifen di tudert, lewehmat d tugdi kecem‑t s ul‑is:
Yemuqel lɛeb iman-is
Yeswehm‑it wayen iwela.
Amek ara d‑ijab tifrat i wayen ɣef i‑iḍal yiẓri‑s? Isafen, igarawen,idurar, itran, iṭij, tizegwa, anwi d netta anwi d wiyad…
Yesteqsay deg yiman-is
Andi i-iteddu ansi I d‑yekka?
Yezzi yenneḍ, yewwi yerra, tasusmi tekbel allaɣ-is, lḥir yettnarni,tasa tesbek dɣa…..
Akken ad t-yefru d ṛay-is
Akken ad iqabel azekka
Yerfed allen –is s iggeni
Yenn-yas yis-k ara lḥuɣ
Seg assen:
Ur zriɣ acimi
Lamaɛni assen‑nni
I yebda umenuɣ.
Igduden ḥudden tilisa, yal wa iṣaḥi‑t ‑id umur‑is di ddunit. Nulfented timura, mgaraden leǧnas. Lamaɛna xas akken, tmaɛ yezwer ɣer ulawen, yecceg ɣer yixfawen, timhujrit tellid ifassen-is dɣa yal lqum inuda amek ara yyer wayed ddew iḍaren‑is:
Tekkered tmurt ɣer tayeḍ
Tenna‑yas ad imɣureɣ
Akal‑im a yi‑teǧǧeḍ
Ma ulac yidem ad naɣeɣ
Seg assen trad yeṭafer wayeḍ, lhem yettnerni ɣef lhem, idim yassawel I yidim, tezla ɣer leslaḥ uwɛir tella‑d di lmedad, Reḥma d lehna nejlent ɣer wanda ur d ttuɣalent:
Iyi iman ‑im ur teẓmireḍ
Si lsas ara kem hudeɣ!
Yal lqum yegga I yiman‑is assekud s wacu ara yeddu, ddin s wacu ara yamen, laɛwayed s wacu ara yiddir. Yal wa yenwa d ilugan i‑iressa I temedurt‑is i-iffan tid n wiyaḍ, d nunti kkan i‑ilaqen ad ddun yisen-t wiyaḍ, ma d wind ur neddi, ur nelḥi yisen‑t d manafaq, ilaq ad yettweɣḍel. Am akken mgarden‑t tikta, myexbacent tidmiwin, yemgared ubrid yettawin ɣef lmeḥna:
Ttnadin ɣef tasrut
Tawwurt werɛad I ttufin
Ceɣlen ma telhu tafsut
Nitini deg agris ɣellin
Ger ‑asen lefhma tluɣ
Yuɣal yal wa amek yettawali
Akken tuli ay tṣub, akken tsub I tettali, amdan yetɣewwel yugar awaɣzen! Ula ger watmaten cwal yegguni ɣef umnar. Anda ur tefri i tzed acidi, anda akken i tefra i d‑yenulfu wakres. Yal wa anda tenfel lefhama fell‑as, yal wa anda txus tmusni deg ayal‑as. D win i t‑icuden i t-yesɣarsen, d win i t‑yesɣarsen ila t-yettcuddun:
Bab‑as akken i d‑yelli imi‑s
Mmi‑s yuzzel ad yaɣ awal
Iḥebes‑it‑id ccix‑is
Yanna ‑yas aha uɣal
Inn‑as i bab‑k unḥis
Macci akka I teddun timsal!
Tsub ɣer wanda ur d tettali, lefhem yeseɛraq lǧǧeṛa!
tmaɛ, timhujrit, d fad n leḥkem. leɣrur, d udmawen sumata i-yellan deffir cwal anda ma yeḍra di ddunit. Tiwuɣa yesrgagin tudert si lsas‑is werǧin bedlent udem, xas ma allalen n cwal nitni mbadelen di tagnit ɣer tayeḍ. Amdan s lebɣi neɣ s tugdi yenjred abrid I lfetna, lfetna tuɣ amkan ger‑nneɣ ar melmi?
Asmi ara texlu ddunit
kulci ad yenger di lqɛa
Ur d‑ttili ara tefjrit
Ssuq n tudert yefra
S kra yellan ulact‑it
Amzun di laɛmer ur d‑yella
Anegeru mi ara yeɣli
Ad yini anwi ɣef ara rfuɣ?
Ur ẓriɣ ara acimi
Lamaɛni assen‑ni
Ad yekfu umenuɣ !
Ait Slimane Hamid